Borowitz: CNN Warns Swine Flu Could Continue through Sweeps

ROTFLMAO (from Andy Borowitz):

CNN reported today that its reporting of the swine flu story could spread significantly in the days and weeks ahead and might continue throughout the all-important May sweeps rating period.

CNN said that its early reporting of the swine flu story had been contained to one or two hours a day but had recently increased to all twenty-four hours.


Even as CNN reported that its broadcasting of the swine flu story was on the rise, there was evidence that intense cases of swine flu reporting had spread from CNN to MSNBC.

"We have also seen several cases of panic-inducing graphics and terrifying fonts," said MSNBC spokesman Terry McTate. "I don't want to frighten people, but we haven't seen a story this scary since Y2K."

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