BREAKING: Obama to nominate Jesus Christ to Supreme Court -- Republicans Announce Filibuster

Best blog post of the week is from DKos' WinSmith:

In a breaking story still emerging, President Barack Obama has announced the nomination of Jesus Christ of Nazareth to fill the vacancy on the Supreme Court to replace the retiring justice David Souter. Republicans hastily called a press conference to announce outrage at the selection, and an immediate filibuster.

"I'm confident that I'd found a candidate known for wisdom, humility, affinity for all human beings, and a solid sense of justice," Obama said, with Jesus standing quietly next to him in meditative reporse. "I'm also confident that I've found a candidate all congressmen, republicans and democrats, can agree would make a valuable addition to the court" Obama continued, as Jesus blessed the wine.


"This is yet another example of a liberal president nominating a liberal, without any consultation with the republican party on his selection." Newt Gingrich responded. "The President assumes that just because we invoke Jesus's name while justifying violent torture, starting horrible wars and letting millions of children go without health insurance, that we're an automatic vote for Jesus. Not this time, Mr. President!"
In his forty-third appearance on cable news, Bill Kristol had the following to say:

"People think the republican party doesn't want to work with democrats on this nomination. We do. Believe me, the last thing we want to do is filibuster. We just want a candidate who more reflects the core values of the republican party. Like Idi Amin. Or Pol Pot."

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