Editorial: "Americans, please wash hands before criticizing Obama"

Here's Bill Maher's editorial, Americans, please wash hands before criticizing Obama, which was inclued in last night's New Rules Segment.

From the Daily News:

It's sad that the leader of the free world had to call a live press conference to tell his nation of clueless nitwits that employees must wash hands before returning to work. If that's not the "Forrest Gump-ification" of America, I don't know what is. Feeling wet, America? Why not try new, "Coming in from the Rain"?

You may think I'm blowing this out of proportion, but this plea from Obama - you know, the "Audacity of Soap" - was the first specific thing a President has asked the American people to actually do in decades. Unless you count "go shopping." Hopefully it will open the door to other, slightly weightier suggestions from the President.


There's a name for people who do the right thing for their country, even if it involves sacrifice. And no, it's not "socialists." It's "patriots." We all know the modern definition of a patriot: It's the person who pays the least taxes and listens to the most A.M. radio. But that wasn't what it always meant.


Rush Limbaugh celebrated this Earth Day by praising coal-fired power plants and the plastic bag, while Glenn Beck cheered a man on while he cut down trees.

During the campaign, Obama suggested that one simple thing Americans could do to help with fuel-efficiency was check their car's tire pressure. And Republicans freaked, because to them, every suggestion for the common good is a direct attack on their personal liberty, and it's unpatriotic to interfere with anyone's God-given right to be big, dumb and selfish.

When the President suggests things that will help the greater good, that's not a slight against your fragile manhood. I know, you're a rugged individualist. But you're not - you're just a schmuck.

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